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What is a Bucket Movie? Overlooked, weird and rare films, that for one reason or another fell through the cracks and failed to get a mainstream audience. Cult classics, unknown oddities and the extremely hard to find, finally get the press they deserve here!

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The Long Long Trailer (1953) Review

September 29th 2011 17:11
Ah poor poor Lucile Ball. The woman was infinitely talented, but
The Long Long trailer Poster
It was indeed a long long trailer
Hollywood had so much trouble finding a place for her. Lucille Ball could sing, she could dance, and on top of that she had the comic timing of a Marx brother. On top of all that, she was a classic beauty. Unfortunately, her comic leanings made casting directors reluctant to give her serious roles for fear she wouldn't be taken seriously, and directors of comedies felt that her elegance and beauty was a waste on goofball antics. For this reason, she never really reached a level of stardom in the movies, And this went double for her Cuban husband Desi Arnez.

Arnez was just as talented as his wife, and while he was a popular band leader he never got his star to shine very brightly in Hollywood. Despite being very knowledgeable about almost every aspect of showbiz, and an amazing actor, his ethnic minority made it almost impossible for him to get starring roles in the narrow minded 1950's Hollywood. However, this couple would soon say Adios to Hollywood, and make it big with their television show “I love Lucy” and become television legends. What few people know however, is that the couple did make a triumphant return to the big screen, as a team, bringing their manic slapstick style of comedy to the cinema.

“The Long Long Trailer” was the story of Nicky and Tracy, played by Desi and Lucy respectively, as their adventures in a Redmond New Moon Motor home. The movie took place at a time when trailers were a bit of a fad, and motor home culture was just starting to take off, but this movie gives a less than glamorous look at married life within a traveling trailer. But the Madcap Antics are all in the spirit of fun. A memorable scene Involves Micky learning to drive the long heavy trailer through downtown traffic, panicking as he constantly forgets to apply the trailer breaks. Another Memorable scene involves Tracy trying to make dinner in the moving trailer with hilarious results


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: L
   


Mother, Jugs and Speed (1976) Review

July 19th 2011 02:09
Ever since I started writing this blog, many people have approached me with movies they think I should review. While this is always appreciated some suggestions are less helpful that others (Note to my readers: The Matrix, is NOT an obscure film) Imagine my surprise when my co-worker Jeff asked if I wanted to see a Bill Cosby comedy from the 70s that I never even heard of. Considering my extensive knowledge of obscure cinema, I'm always pleasantly surprised to find a movie that I'm not aware of.
motherjugsandspeed
There's somthing darkly funny about a beer drinking ambulance driver

“Mother, Jugs and Speed” is a dark comedy about a private ambulance company, that operates just this side of legal. Bill Cosby's character know affectionately as “Mother” and his pot smoking co-driver drive around bribing cops,cruising strip clubs, betting on the number of dead bodies they'll haul in a night and occasionally get in a shootout with drug addicts. All of this handled with casual, dry wit that makes you feel guilty to be laughing at it. It's strange seeing the normally wholesome Bill Cosby being vulgar and darkly comedic, but this is long before his days as a sitcom dad.
Harvey Keitel and the lovely Raquel Welch also star here, both giving excellent performances. Kaitel plays a suspended cop suspected of dealing speed, and Welch plays a shapely and intelligent dispatcher affectionately known as Jugs by her co-workers. While this cast is enjoyable and the movie is undeniably funny, it's failing is an aimless plot


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: M
   


The Good the Bad and the Weird (2008) Review

May 14th 2011 13:14
I have the same relationship with Korean Film that I do with the Cleveland Browns. I want to love the Browns, Josh Cribs is fun to watch, and almost every season seems promising, but they always disappoint. In the same way, Korean cinema always looks pretty awesome, the trailers show beautiful cinematography, and intriguing stories, but once I see the film, they usually seems overlong, dry and boring. Sure their beautifully shot, and
Good, Bad, Weird, Poster
Ignore those Sundance style Palm Leaves, Rest assured this isn't a crappy Independent film.
Korean actors are some of the best in the world, but the movies are more dramas than they are action films and lack the flash and spectacle of the movies from Thailand, Hong Kong or the States. While movies like “City of Violence” came close, it always seems Korean films are just to culturally different, and appeal to too specific an audience to really give me the thrill other movies do. But damn it, I WANT to love Korean films, they always look so cool, but I never had a “wow” experience with a Korean Movie. . . . until Now. Honk Kong has “Legend of Drunken Master” America had “Kill Bill” Chile has “Kiltro” and now, Korea has “The Good the Bad and the Weird”.
Director Jae Woo Kim, like many Korean directors is known for his Crime Dramas and sappy love stories, but still considered one of the best in the world, a director I've always thought promising. The film takes place in 1930's Manchuria, an area that, at the time was very similar to the old west. Firstly, the area was vitally lawless, thanks to territorial disputes between the Japanese and Chinese, and it was the point of immigration for Koreans, Russians and some Japanese making it a very culturally neutral area, much like 1870's Texas. The story of the film focuses on a trio of misfits, a Thief, a Gangster, and a Bounty Hunter, thrown into a three-way battle for a mysterious Chinese map the leads to a treasure cryptically marked as “Great amounts, buried below” the story is thin as toilet paper, the exact opposite of most Korean films. Most Koreans movies are a deep story occasionally interrupted by action, this movie is about deep action occasionally interrupted by a story.
That's not the say the story is BAD, it's a good vehicle for the show stopping action sequences. “The Good the Bad and the Weird” is all about the wacky, off the wall shootouts. The action sequences come one after the other, like a one-two punch, and the movie's wild west gunfights are as fun as they are amazing. It goes from being like a Sergio Leoni sequence to a Buster Keaton sequence, to nothing less than a live-action Anime that hardly ever pauses to let you catch your breath. Unlike most Asian films, there really no martial arts tied up in the action, but it does do gunfights like I've never seen them done before


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: G
   


Fire and Ice (1983) Review With trailer!

April 7th 2011 06:08
Before the Lord of the Rings Trilogy made fantasy film making geeky cool, there was a number of attempts to make the Fantasy genre into film. For whatever reason fantasy film has always had a problem getting a foothold on the hearts and minds of Moviegoers, no matter how hard it tried. While Films like “Conan the Barbarian” and “Krull” are considered classics, none have quite reached that blockbuster status they strive for. In 1983 Ralph Bakshi had already had some success with “The Lord of the Rings” and his more enigmatic “Wizards” so he decided to have another go at the fantasy genre.
Trying now for a more original approach to the genre, Bakshi enlisted
Fire, Ice, Larn
That Teegra is one of Frank Frazetta's best Babes,
some of the biggest names in fantasy art and writing. First among these is the legendary Frank Frazetta, known worldwide for his sexy barbarian girls and amazing images of fantasy worlds. Frazetta designed the characters, and even hand painted the backgrounds giving this film the look and feel of a Frazetta painting come to glorious life. The screenplay was penned by two veterans of Marvel's “Conan” series Gerry Conway and Roy Thomas. While the Voices are a mishmash of unknowns, one standout was Emmy-Award winner Maggie Roswell as the lovely princess Teegra, who later went on to voice Maud Flanders and a number of others in The Simpsons. Bizarrely, two other Background painters for the move went on to gain some fame: James Gurney of Dinotopia fame, and the painter of light himself, Thomas Kinkade. Kinkade claims to have learned his unique light-painting style from doing this movie.
The story of “Fire and Ice” is classic light fantasy “Barbarian” style writing. You'll find no noble elves or hobbits in this story, only axe-wielding muscle bound heroes, and large breasted damsels in distress. The film takes place somewhere around the end of the ice age, the evil wizard Nekron is using his dark magic and neanderthal-like soldiers to force the world's population closer and closer to the equator, in hopes of capturing the kingdom of “Firekeep” and thereby ruling the world. A young warrior named Larn looses his villiage in the war and seeks to reap vengeance against Nekron. Along the way he rescues the scantly clad Heroin Teegra, with whom he falls in love, and the mysterious warrior Darkwolf, who also seeks vengeance on Necron. The story is as skimpy as Teegra's outfit, and almost every line of dialogue sounds like Dragonforce lyrics . . but do we really watch a movie like this for the story


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: F
   


Captain Eo (1986) Review With Clip!

February 19th 2011 21:13
I am a fan of Film oddities, and Michael Jackson's film debut “Captain Eo” is possibly one of the most bizarre footnotes in movie history. Late in the 1980's Disney had lots of money to throw around, and decided they wanted to make a film attraction of their Epcot center attraction. Disney had big plans for their movie theater, this wasn't going to be a typical movie
Captain Eo, MIchael Jackson
Only Jacko and possibly Elton John would be able to pull off an outfit like that.
theater. It would feature special effects that would expand beyond the screen, laser blasts and starfields would fill the entire theater, combined with 3d film and a state of the art sound system this would be an film watching experience like nothing else. The only thing that was missing, was a movie to show in this high-tech cinema, and as good as most Disney fare was at the time, Pinocchio probably wasn't going to be apropriate, so what to do? Disney theme parks came up with a plan, they were going to use all their resources, to engineer their own mini-blockbuster.
The producers assembled what they thought would be the ultimate movie dream team. The screenwriter would be none other than Star Wars creator George Lucas. The Score would be penned and conducted by the one and only James Horner. How aobut Director? Let's not mess around, we get Oscar winner and all around legend Francis For Coppola. As if that wasn't enough, the star would be possibly one of the most recognizable faces in the world, Michael Jackson. The special effects were handled by Disney “Immagineers” the same folks who build rides and attractions at Disneyland.
“Captain Eo” has, at best a fairly anorexic story. Captain Eo, (played by Jackson) and his rag-tag crew (That consists entirely of tragically unfunny puppets) Is off to an unamed planet to give the planet's “Supreme Leader” a gift. Angelica Houston plays the hideous cyborg leader of the planet, earning her nearly 3 hours in a makeup chair for only a few seconds of screen-time. Of course, being that this movie is only 17 minutes long, this isn't really all that bad. The movie features two songs and dance numbers, each written by Michael Jackson with the dances choreographed by him


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: C
   


Titan AE (2000) Review

January 26th 2011 18:50
I'm a huge fan of animated movies, and one of the often neglected masters of animation is Don Bluth. With “All dogs go to heaven”, “An American Tale” and “The secret of Nihm” The number of animated classics on his resume is impressive to say the least. Sadly, we live in a day and
Drej
How many movies Blow up the Earth in the first five minutes?
age when animated films are generally vehicles to sell stuffed toys and amusement park tickets. While I got no problem with Disney, Don Bluth's work has always seemed a little more . . .genuine and endearing to me when compared to the biggest Disney blockbusters. He seems a man who's there to created something beautiful, edgy, and thought provoking while Disney's work often seems uninspired and formulaic.
In 2000 Don Bluth got his hot hands on a script for a science fiction film that had been tossed around to several directors and studios for years, one for a more “Adult” animated film that featured a science fiction premise that rivaled Star Wars or Dune in terms of depth and imagination. Long being a proponent that animation isn't just for kids, Don Bluth took the reins and gave us “Titan AE” one of my personal favorite animated films.
Titan AE begins on . . .shall we say, a low note. In the first five minutes of the film, the planet Earth is blown to pieces by an alien race known as “the Dredge” beings a pure energy that for one reason or another feel greatly threatened by mankind's continued existence. A young Cale is rescued by his father, sent on a ship escaping the planet but left with a mark on his left hand that will one day direct him to his father's life work, a mysterious and powerful ship that was the reason the Dredge got all up in our grill in the first place. Years later Cale is rescued by pirate captain Keslo, who promises him a way to find his lost birthright, the Titan, and with it a way to save what's left of the human race


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: T
   


Westworld (1973)

January 8th 2011 17:37
Michael Crichton has been hailed as one of the best science fiction writers on the late 20th century, and he racked up classic after classic with the likes of “Jurassic Park” and “The Andromeda Strain” to his name. Not to many folks realize Crichton has had a modest career as a film maker, where he wrote and directed some of the 1970's better sci-fi films. Saddly forgotten to time is the 1973 sci-fi thriller “Westworld” featuring Yul Brynner and James Brolin.
Westworld, Yul Brinner
I really Miss those groovy old 1970's Movie posters

Westworld takes place at a decadent (and expensive) theme park in the near future, where though the use of sophisticated androids guests can experience medieval times, a pre-christian Rome, or the wild west. The high tech computer controlled park boasts that everything is made to run perfectly, but near the beginning we hear a technician warn that no one truly knows how the Androids work as they were designed and built by computers, but in typical sci-fi fashion he's soon dismissed. Inevitably, the robots go haywire (betcha saw that coming) and our heroes Peter and John, two hapless schmucks just out for a relaxing vacation, find themselves fighting for their lives as the epitomes “Gunslinger” played by the immortal Yul Brynner begins tracking them down.
One can't help but see similarities between this film and Crichton's later bestseller “Jurassic Park” and wonder if he had some kind of traumatic experience at a theme park. Still, the similarities are ultimately superficial, as Jurassic Park is more a story about the dangers of science gone to far and “Westworld” is more just about action. Crichton directed this movie with a spectacular flair, taking advantage of all the meager but impressive special effects of the day, along with crisp and effective scene setting. Yul Brynner as the Gunslinger is a highlight here, playing the part of an unstoppable, merciless machine comes naturally to Brynner, who plays the roll so convincingly you genuinely fear him despite the fact the costumer recycled Brynner's outfit from “The Magnificent Seven


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: W
   


Virtuosity (1995) Review

December 27th 2010 21:31
Back in the 90's the world was to be blessed with a little thing called “Virtual Reality”. The idea that a computer could be programed to put you into a simulated world so realistic you couldn't distinguish it from the real thing. It's applications were to be endless, surgeons and police could be trained in dangerous tasks free from real life concurrences, technology could be tested and developed without the restraints of real-world physics, and of course it would make for some pretty sweet video games. Sadly, in the end all we got were the video games (I plunked a lot of quarters into “Dactyl Terror” back in the day) but from these lofty predictions we got the “Cyberpunk” of science fiction whicch gave us such movies as “Ghost in the Machine” “The Lawnmower Man” and of course, “The Matrix”.
Today I'm going to look at one of the lesser known classics of the genre, “Virtuosity” starring a young Denzel Washington in battle with a young Russel Crowe. As predicted in the optimistic vision of VR's creators, the police in “Virtuosity” use VR to train cops in tracking down killers, To challenge these police, the VR programmers whipped up a psychotic program named SID 6.7 who was visually “Raised” by 200 mass murderers, sadists and dictators. Unfortunately the psychotic program was made a bit too well, as it figured out how to kill people in reality, and eventually even escapes the computer world (in a nigh-invicible robotic body to boot) to wreak havoc on actual reality. Enter world-weary and street smart cop Parker Barns, who's recruited to take down the malignant killer robot.
This story sounds like it could come out of any issue of “Asimov Science Fiction” and on the surface it sounds very deep and cerebral, however it's not. Like many sci-fi films on the 90's “Virtuosity” uses cheesy sets and costumes, as well as vapid air-headed dialogue riddled with cop-movie cliche. While Russel Crowe is a brilliant actor, he didn't seem to know quite how to depict SID 6.7 who came off as a mix between Hannibal Lector and a Caesar Romero era Joker. Despite being able to kill on a whim the film
EvilSid
Who keep programing robots to kill? I mean seriously knock it off!
made him feel more goofy than scary. And not lovable goofy, more like “Shut the hell up, your not as clever as you think you are” Kind of goofy. Despite this, I enjoyed the film more for the mystery/science fiction mix, and the 90's cool special effect helped out. A somewhat funny cameo by adult star Traci Lords also helped pump up the “geek” factor but was too little too late


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: V
   


Maximum Overdrive (1986) Review

December 4th 2010 19:45
It doesn't matter whether your a fan of Horror movies or not, you've probably seen at least one movie based on something Stephen King wrote. Dozens of classics, some well known and some obscure have been based on the work of the King of Horror, and more are destined to made in the future (Gunslinger . . .please?) However, there is only one incident where King took up the megaphone himself and directed a film, depending on who you talk to that's either a really good or reall bad thing. In my humble opinion, the purest product of Stephen King's deranged imagination is 1986's “Maximum Overdrive”.
The plot of the film is loosely based on Stephen King's short story
Poster
The Wicked Promo poster for this movie, sure made me want to see it!
“Trucks”, Earth passes through the tail of a comet and for some reason machines of every kind, ranging from ATMs to Semi trucks come to life and go on a homicidal rampage, killing everyone in their path. This spelled trouble for the staff of the Dixie Boy truck stop, where the massive trucks they serviced encircled the establishment, brutally running down anyone trying to leave. Bill Robinson, A hapless ex-con working at the truck stop, decides that escape is the only option, and leads the survivors in a perilous escape.
The real joy of this movie isn't so much in it's storyline (as gripping as it is) but the splatter fest that ensues in nearly every scene. Coke Machines go berserk and pelt people with cans, Lawn mowers run wild, an ice-cream truck goes nuts and chases children in the street (while it bizarrely plays an ice-cream truck version of “King of the Road”) and an ATM spouts out profanity instead of money. A memorable scene has a homicidal steamroller take out an entire little league team. In the unrated Laser-disc version of the film one of the kid's heads explode in a massive blood splatter as the steamroller runs him over. It's rumored that at a preliminary screening George A Romero himself vomited while watching this scene. Having the director of “Night of the Living dead” blow chunks because your movie is too gory for him if quite a feather in anyone's cap. While the directing is okay for about half the film, the other half it's amateurish and in some scenes just plain bad. King explains he was “Coked out of mind” while making the movie and admits “I had no idea what I was doing” in an FAQ on his website he answers the question “Will you ever direct another movie?” By saying “No, have you actually SEEN Maximum Overdrive


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: M
   


Down Under the Big Top (1996) Review

November 18th 2010 04:39
Heya folks! Sorry about the long lag between posts, the Samurai has been a bit pre-occupied with the real world, but now that I've shaken that off, who wants to hear about some more obscure flicks?

Bands sometimes get weird merchandising, to be sure. Journey had an arcade game, KISS Has a comic book, and popular Australian Christian Rock bank “The Newsboys” Had a movie. Since I started writing the blog I've longed to find a movie so obscure you can't even find it on IMDB and with “Down under the Big Top” it seems I've finally succeed. Rotten Tomatos has no site for it, Wikipedia and Allmovie never touched it, and there are a scant few clips even on Youtube. Still, “Down under the big Top” isn't all that bad, albeit an extremely rare film


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Posted By: Joshua the Samurai - Category: D
   


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