KvC: Komodo vs. Cobra - Part 2
February 17th 2008 23:11
Category: No Category
Just like fighting a giant cobra, don't waste 1000 bullets on a komodo. It will do nothing people, absolutely nothing!
It turns out there is a secret lab underneath the barn. Everyone is upset about Darla but Terry, who is extremely happy he found the lab and now he can expose the truth! Everyone wants to know what is going on and it turns out the chick is Dr. Susan Richardson, who is the daughter of a scientist (the old guy at the start who was killed by the snake) that was infamous for his work. Insert crappy animated flashback graphic and let’s dive back into the past.
The whole modified food project is mentioned and it turns out the scientist were very successful. According to Susan if they grew the giant corn on 5000 acres it would be able to feed the entire world! The scientist finds out the General is coming down to see the work and he calls him a son of a *monkey scream*. No, he didn’t call him a monkey scream when he went to swear he was censored out by a monkey screaming. I kid you not, this is the first movie I have ever seen that censored our course language. Anyway, the General appears and he basically wants them to triple their research money, if they start doing a little experimenting on animals. He brings in a komodo inside a steel crate and though you can only see the eyes, these ones look badly animated as well.
Dr. Susan says they wanted to test the animals to enhance the U.S Troops. Back to the past and it seems that the animals escaped. It kills a scientist and at the same time a giant komodo comes out! Oh damn! Showdown between the animals! The title is living up to its name finally! Wait never mind, one idiot doctor starts shooting at them. The komodo backs off and the cobra runs away. Susan says the army is worried they haven’t contacted them and Michael says its all over, the army is going to destroy them. They ask why and it turns out Michael was in the air force for years. At that moment planes fly over head, the ones taking the video footage, and leave. Terry, the idiot that he is, asks of the bombing was over. Of course not you damn moron. You can hear them fly overhead but you cannot hear the bombs hitting the ground above you? Rebecca brother Ted starts going crazy but they calm him down.
They grab all the guns and ammo in the base meanwhile, the General and Major look at the footage. This looks like the same bad footage of the island they used in the first movie but they just edited a gigantic komodo on it. They find the boat out on the sea so they assume someone’s on the island to steal the formula. The General informs the Major he is going to give the search team until noon tomorrow before the island is destroyed. They give their stupid salutes and walk off. You know, I just noticed that after everything that is said by the two they just randomly salute.
High school band music starts playing as the team takes off for the boat. We’re treated to more boring shots of the island and there’s a lot more walking again. Everyone’s talking about random crap and they hear noises. A man stumbles out of the bushes with a grey bloody face. It’s someone Susan knows. He says they were ambushed by a komodo as they tried to get to the helicopter. We go to a flashback. The komodo grabs one guy with his tongue and eats him. It chases the other two guys. One guy tries to jump over a gate but gets stuck… and by stuck I mean he has his leg rests up on the gate like he was doing some stretches before a race. He stands there for over ten seconds and the komodo stomps on him. The other guy survived, but he was infected by the saliva of the komodo and dies. The hippies want to dig a grave for him but the others say no.
They find the raft and everyone is excited. They look at the boat and everyone start commenting on how nice is looks, which means it’s going to get destroyed or something now. And I was right; some planes fly in and bomb it to pieces. The cobra emerges out of the sea and everyone starts shooting it, but Ted who is stupid enough to run at it with a stick. Ted gets eaten and the snake heads back out to sea, but not before he destroys their raft. What a devilish and clever snake! Susan says they will be safe during the night since none of them are going to attack. Terry wants to build a raft but everyone wants to find the helicopter. Terry gets pissed off and walks off. Carrie walks after him and starts trying to calm down her boyfriend. Terry gets censored by another monkey scream. Sandra starts recording another story while Michael tries to seduce Susan with alcohol.
Back at the Army HQ the General is talking to the Major and find out about the boat and who is belongs to. The Major asks if they can save the people on the island but the General doesn’t care about who is on the island and wants to knocked off the map. Doesn’t this all sound too similar to the first movie?
High school band music starts playing again and we watch everyone walk around and around until they see a mountain. The helicopter is beyond that point. So more high school band music starts playing and there’s more walking around and around and around. God, you people have no damn idea how boring this crap is. They come to a river and they begin crossing it. Jerry’s back starts burning him so they drag him on shore. They lift up his top and he has gigantic leeches on his back. Wow, they look so bad. They remove the leeches and Susan says everything on the island is mutated. Now that Terry is infected, he could become mutated as well. So we are going to get a gigantic hippy crybaby now? Can this movie get any worse?
Mutated leeches or gigantic jam logs?
Back at the Army HQ the Major says that they should send in people to save the news reporter and the One World group. Wait, how the hell did they find out all of those people were on the island when all they found was the boat? The General doesn’t care and just wants the place bombed since it is a military place and they all shouldn’t have been there to begin with. Damn right!
We are all treated to more high school band music starts with more walking around. Jerry is getting sick so they shoot him up with penicillin. Carrie and Terry have a nice little scene together while Michael is censored by a screaming monkey again. Oh no, the army jets are flying in! The group reaches the helicopter and Sandra starts recording but Michael grabs the equipment from her and tells her to get in. Hold up, the komodo emerges and looks at it, just like in the few movie. Someone gets censored by the screaming monkey as they express their frustration while Terry gets up without anyone knowing to distract the komodo.
Michael tries to save Terry as the girls run to the helicopter. Michael unloads 200 bullets from the same clip at the komodo. The komodo turns its attention and it seems like Terry is now safe, but the cobra comes out from behind and eats him! Yes! That was great! The cobra locks its eyes onto the komodo. The komodo turns around and stares down the cobra. They two slowly walk up to each other and it looks like we have our showdown! Ding ding ding! Here we go! Komodo vs Cobra! The jets go in as Captain makes his way to the helicopter. The komodo and the cobra circle each other and well… that’s all they are doing. Cobra bites the Komodo! Komodo bites the Cobra! Michael can’t start up the motor. Cobra wraps itself around the komodo and bites it several times! Jets start dropping their bombs! At least these explosions look a lot better. The women are screaming but the helicopter finally starts up and takes off. A bomb drops on the cobra and komodo and we have ourselves a tie.
The General is at his computer, and the Major finds out the people made it off the island. I bet he found out from the news. The Major says he found out… on the news. Wow this sound so familiar. I think I know where this is going. The General looks pissed off and gets ready to release a statement. Oh, he didn’t kill himself. The island is burning and everything has been completely destroyed, everything but the dead guy with the grey face. Oh no! He awakes up to reveal a snake-like tongue and reptile-like eyes! The movie ends with a close up on this hybrid zombie komodo snake human thing.
I'm scared of this freak not because of his appearance, but the fact there could be a possible 3rd Komodo movie...
So there you have it people, a sequel to a movie that is exactly the same as the prequel but worse. I’ll have my final thoughts up on this movie within the next few days so I shall see you all there. Be cool my Bucket Heads and I am glad that I have saved you all from this horrible movie.
[Click To Go Back To Part 1]
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